up on a mountain

(written friday morning. . .)

i'm sitting on top of pinnacle in a cozy, shaded nook i have found and i am thinking about life. the beauty of God is made so evident here; it's beyond me that disbelief is so rampant. life's simplicity is all i can think about. my purpose is simply to love people and to glorify God while doing so. how can i ever miss that? i have the most fabulous people in my life. i have friends that encourage and a family that loves. i have the perfect tools to fulfill my purpose, but alas!

climbing pinnacle used to be a daily routine for me. i would throw my hiking clothes on, grab my camelbak, and drive toward the east summit trail with my windows down and my music blaring. some days were made to climb alone, some days found the company of a friend or two. it was difficult at first; i didn't know the trail and i found myself weary and out of breath. but then it got easier. my feet knew which rocks were unstable, which turns to take, which hidden views were worth venturing off the trail for. and the summit, oh! the summit. nothing compares to making that last step to find yourself on a mountaintop, staring the landscape in the breathtaking face. perspective is restored and you remember that you are but a small speck in a big world. that the materialization of the city is but a minuscule part of the land as a whole. and you find yourself saying, it's worth it. and it is. it's so worth it.

i find myself sitting and thinking how much my life with Christ resembles my relationship with this mountain. it's exciting, advantageous, scary. the journey is brutal at first, falling and scraping your knees around every unknown corner. but then you get to the top of the mountain and you can't figure out why you haven't been there all along. the perilous and tiresome journey becomes but a distant memory in your mind as you breathe in the goodness of God. and the trek only becomes easier with time. we learn which traps to avoid, which places to use both of our hands and all of our might to get past, which places to stop and simply enjoy the view.

i am back at the beginning in both areas. i climbed up the "easy" side of pinnacle today and thought my life was surely ending. i actually stopped about three quarters of the way up and said, "God, please help me make it to the top. i can't live here." then i paused upon realizing we hadn't talked in a while. i smiled to myself and repeated, "God, please help me make it to the top. i can't live here."

God is faithful. He has given us so many chances. are you at the summit of the mountain? did you run to the top? are you paralyzed on a rock, begging for help to get to the finish? or are you simply driving past the mountain, remembering your old friend?